Friendships that won’t serve your 2020 vision


We are finally in the new year.

New you, new boo, new career but still screaming, No new friends?


I’m about to give you a reality check of some of behaviours your friends may be showing that don’t serve you being your best, feeling your best and living your best.


Do you have a friend that feels like they are always trying to compete with you? This friend seems to never be satisfied with anything because they aren’t satisfied with themselves. They will make you feel like you’re not good enough and will always act like they are one step ahead of everything you do, like and enjoy. 

You are in no competition, you may feel at times that the friendship is one sided. You are the first one to congratulate and celebrate their achievements but when it’s your turn they will briefly congratulate you, followed by advice of what they did and what you should have done or what they could have done for you that would have made it even better.

This type of friend will continue to show you that they are ONLY out for themselves. Keep this friend around you long enough, and their insecurities may rub off on you.


  Similar to the competitor, an attention seeker will always ‘secretly’ want everything to be about them. When both of you are together everything will be normal until company is compromised with another person or even worse, a group of people. This is when a true attention seekers colours will show.

With no Alcohol needed this person will do anything to keep the attention on them for as long as possible. They may speak extremely loudly and enjoy making a scene by crying or starting drama with another person. They will act like a victim, for the outcome to attract attention and have the limelight shine on them, always.

A attention seeker will know how to make you feel guilty for not giving them the attention they believe they deserve. Although you won’t admit it to others you know deep down which friend of yours is an attention seeker. Be aware of this friend form now because if not you are not you’ll be under their attention spell always wondering what is wrong and finding ways to constantly please them.


This type of friend loves a good pity party. They will use every opportunity to complain and whinge about how bad their life is and why everything always goes wrong for them. When you try and sway the conversation to something positive they will always revert to pity by responding negatively.

We all have moments in life (I certainly do) that have us feeling overwhelmed, over drained and over everything. It’s good to speak to someone who understands you as it allows you to release some of the pressures, overflowing in your mind. The difference with a ‘pity friend ‘is that they secretly enjoy having negative conversations. It’s their comfort zone to be negative and although you may want to help your friend, no one can be helped in this world unless they really want it.

This energy is infectious if you invest yourself in it for too long. Conversations with this person will always have you feeling negative and doubtful about your life, completely forgetting how happy you were before speaking to them.


This type of friend doesn’t have any intention to grow and develop as a person. Same old attitude and same old mindset but wonder why they are in the same old situation (Read this one again, I certainly did).

This friend can’t see beyond their own current situation and therefore may not understand how to support your vision for more. You may find yourself being the motivator, always trying to help yourself and friend by suggesting business ideas or just trying something new and spontaneous for a change. This friend may agree with you in the moment but has no intentions to act upon anything.

Becoming aware of this kind of friend will allow you to be in control of how much of your time you should give to this friendship. Especially when coming out of your comfort zone it’s important that your time Is spent more with the people who support the person you are becoming, then the current version that everyone is familiar with.

Don’t wait on another person to allow yourself to grow. We all do thing at different times.

I hope this post helps you to stay woke on some of the behaviours that don’t serve your vision and allows you attract new friendships that will support your goals this new year.

Sending you positive vibes always.

  Rens x